Only you could make a story about freaking razor blades into tale about stealing some rich bum's ex-stripper wife. First you tell all the "orbiters" to put a barrel in their mouth, then you hand them some ammo. Bravo.
This is the opposite of a safe space. I fully expect to read things that challenge or offend me, or at least that I disagree with. And I expect that I will be called on my own bullshit if I post some of it. That’s what I signed up and paid for.
On the subject of orbiters, I met my wife and 20 and married her at 25. I thank God all the time I don’t have to deal with all of the bullshit you describe, and with luck and a little bit of effort, I hopefully never will.
Yeah, I'm not sure about the "safe space" label, but ACF is a very unique corner of today's internet because of the intelligent conversation going on. Nobody is here just to troll, start fights, or get offended by an opinion that doesn't exactly mirror their own. I haven't run across any miserable souls who are just here to point out typos or desperatly trying to show that they know more about cars - or the topic of the day - than the author, therefore proving to themselves that they should be the ones with their name on top of the page instead of mixed in with the plebs at the bottom (the "Insurance Company community" was (and probably still is) unbearable because of this).
So, maybe that does make it, quote, unquote, "safe," but whatever it is, it is special! Thanks for gambling on yourself, Jack!
I live about an hour from Pictured Rocks in Upper Michigan. They have a "free" day for Yoopers on their boat tours. My wife, skinflint that she is, has suggested going and I've always refused to go because holy shit, no way am I being surrounded by a crowd like that.
So I read the comment about going to the zoo or aquarium on freeday, and all the freaks that turn up. First thing I thought about was the free day for Yooper’s at the pictured rock tours. We have lived in different places in the UP that were just a short drive from this and we knew people that would go to it. I told my wife there is no freaking way I’m gonna go stand in line with the unwashed. Considering I wear an old beat up Carhart and equally beat up Red Wings, that’s really saying something.
Whereabouts in the UP are you? I've probably been in your neck of the woods at one time or another.
When my oldest was a toddler, we went bombing through what was then the unpaved truck trail through the Pictured Rocks in a Volvo 142E in order to get to the tour boat in Munising on time. Then I had to physically restrain her from going over the rail into Superior as she tried to make friends with the seagulls.
We're in Marquette right now. We're looking to move out into the woods within the next year. It's quite a bit different now versus when we were here for college (we both graduated '05). It used to be the city itself was a fairly quiet place, even when the students are here, and if you ventured out into the wilderness you would be completely alone. Even Pictured Rocks used to have some very nice solitary hiking. All that has changed now. It's still quite beautiful, but you have to be willing to share it with the hordes of tourists all year round, because it doesn't die off in the winter. We see snowmobilers, skiers, ice fishermen, etc etc, and RVs and fifth-wheel trailers stretching all the way to the horizon. I don't want to become one of those old guys who dreams about how much better things were in his youth, but... things were better when I was younger! Still a pretty nice place to live, though, especially compared against where I grew up in and around Toledo.
It will just make you want to Kurt Cobain yourself.
"I worked three hours a day at the surf shop, put myself through UCLA, and bought a 1969 Z-28 with the extra money, right before we spent $4,999 on a new house in Malibu!"
How in the name of Zeus's butthole do productive, ambitious people get all that stuff done? Think Manhattan stockbrokers. 80 hours a week, and yet they still have time to go apartment hunting, commute ungodly distances and to socialize after work. When IS "after work," anyway?
I use Personna Lab Blue double edge blades in my MerKur 34C. They’re excellent. Factory is in Verona VA. American Safety Razor co which became Edgewell after Walmart fucked ASR. Only USA made dual edge. I don’t know of any other besides Gillette so I believe you are the first to actually put this new info on the internet. Fantastic research.
My single buddy and I were shooting the shit last night about his dating travails and triumphs. His observation is that reasonably attractive women are really good at drawing in orbiters through thirst trap social media posts. So much so that they believe all men should orbit them for a while regardless of their attractiveness, status, or what value they offer for the future. He's become extremely adept at recognizing the motions of these lifeless planets and avoids them like the plague they are. He's got stories, man.
Thanks to the simp economy, some women have valued themselves the way old men do their “1 of 1” Corvettes. Many of these women could easily be mistaken for planets.
Dec 19, 2022·edited Dec 19, 2022Liked by Jack Baruth
Can’t comment on USA made blades, but Feather out of Japan makes the finest blades I’ve used. As a “safety” razor devotee, I can attest to their quality and sharpness, having tested many brands on the calibrated instrument known as my pretty face. Also #dontsimpforthe403s
I've shaved with Feather for years. Those and the "Israel" blades are the only 2 that can shave me without damaging my skin. My whiskers are so coarse, they could be recycled as industrial grit.
I hope the quality control on their blade manufacturing is better than on their advertising copy. Make enough typos and I'll start thinking you might not be a native English speaker.
I do wonder at times what some of these former 'ladies' in your life looked like. Moreso because of the names you've given them than any other reason.
I'll also never understand rich parents who don't take the time to teach their children the meaning of work. For me, that's a head scratcher and I've seen it far too many times.
The first time that I met Vodka was at a big auto show. I may have helped Jack with her creds to get in the media preview as he'd sometimes give me a list of people to get in through my web site. Jack was busy with something and I was talking to her and I guess I assumed she was a writer and she said, "I know Jack from outside the industry," with a perfectly salacious inflection.
Over the past decade, because of my dad's medical problems and my own symptoms of middle age, I've had cause to wonder if maybe the warrior cultures of the world aren't right - that it's best to die on a battlefield when you're 30, quickly and honorably, before you have to suffer the indignities of growing old.
I suspect it was more like dying on the battlefield when they were 35-40, next to their adult sons. You'll find references to grandfathers in every ancient culture, so people had to be living at least slightly past thirty. I hope.
I’ve managed to reverse a little of the cycle with strict diet and exercise but i can see it fighting back harder every day, especially when I backslide. The thing that bothers me the most is hairloss. I turn 40 in March and I don’t expect to survive the next decade without living as George Costanza.
In those regards, you’ll be winning until the end of time...or at least your own. I’ll never enjoy the Sean Connery look that seems to the staple of age.
When I came up to NMU for orientation I hung out with this tall, attractive girl for a little while. a month and a half later, having kept touch, I met up with her again but she had assembled quite a little gaggle of semiliterate orbiters. I opted instead to spend a night with her less-attractive older sister, because why not? Despite my lack of dignity I could never bring myself to orbit someone like that. It's a waste of my time.
On a sort of related note, I used to watch Regular Car Reviews on youtube for his jarring and oddly funny humor. One of the last videos of his I ever watched (a few years ago now) was one about, oh, I think it was a Challenger, I don't remember if it was the Hellcat, but he compared it to your "apex girl," the girl you dated that you put on a pedestal and to whom you compare all subsequent dates. It never made sense to me because, while I have shown some bad judgment in girls, I married exactly the one I wanted. I had competition for her, a wealthy young man from Thailand who went to Yale for grad school and is likely worth at least seven figures these days, and a boxer in the US Olympic training program. Both were orbiters. The Thai man gave her a cute teddy bear and wrote her sweet notes. The boxer showed up at her door crying about how much he was in love with her. I told her exactly what I wanted out of her and made it clear I'd walk and never think about her again with no regrets. I honestly had no idea what I was doing at the time but it worked out. Never orbit. Never settle.
I suppose I could have been described as an orbiter or being friendzoned by the woman whom I eventually married or you could say I was playing the long game. From the time we met, when she was dating someone else, I made my intentions clear, so clear, in fact, that her boyfriend threatened me. They broke up when he decided that her roommate's Dutch-girl-from-Grand Rapids perfect teardrop tits were too perfect to resist. We started hanging around and one night it stopped being platonic.
OMG razors don’t get me started! In my past career they were very important. The best were Americanline .009s if I couldn’t get them I would be like a two pack a day smoker with no cigs.
I knew a guy who had a razor sharpener so he could keep them going. I can just imagine him spending his nights honing his razors to save a few cents.
Im about 30 minutes from IDL, and now you’ve piqued my interest in checking it out. How i would plausibly explain this trip to my wife, I have not yet figured out.
I spent the better part of 10 years in and around the food brokerage business. Guessing your Dad's former pals sold to Crossmark, Advantage or Acosta. Those 3, with PE backing, rolled up hundreds of small brokers. In a not shocking at all result, after the feeding frenzy was over they started racing each other to cut out all of the people (costs) that made the indies worth acquiring.
There's a decently strong pendulum-swing back to a new generation of independent brokerages that are easily picking up clients while the big 3 nationals focus on servicing their huge debt load.
Re: Waitresses, Bartenders, Strippers and guys that fawn over them.
“She likes me.” Yep, as long as the money keeps coming. It’s a business transaction for goodness sake!
The male ego is an amazing thing. My dad upon entering the “senior living” establishment he lived in after his second (much younger) wife cleaned him out— then threw him out, “There’s nobody appealing here”. While I had to hand it to him for still wanting to chase some skirts in his 80’s, learn your lesson! I have to admit, I immediately shot back at him, “And what do you think they are saying about you? You’re fat, bald and broke.”
If you’re a 6 and she’s a 9 she’s either a hooker or has an angle. Men probably have more horsepower in the brain department but women sure utilize it better when they need to
Not sure about men being smarter than women; but we’re certainly more logical. Unless we’re thinking with our dicks. Another story, to elaborate on your point. Traveling on business with a product guy— Client meeting/dinner. He and I went to the hotel bar afterward. We were both in our 40’s, the only 2 guys in suits. Gorgeous girl, 20 something, slides in next to him. Dressed in a suit, but the skirt was a little shorter than what we usually saw at work. It was a very boisterous crowd, I can’t hear what’s being said; but she’s got the flirty body language going— touching his arm, laughing a lot, etc. Now, he’s average looking, with not much personality; and again, in his 40’s. Also, he didn’t travel much. Very obvious to me what’s going on, and I’m loving it. He suddenly spins around to me in horror, “She’s a hooker! Get rid of her! I’m going to the bathroom!” After he came back I asked him, “How often does a beautiful girl in her twenties strike up a conversation with you? In fact, how often did it happen when you were in your twenties?” Hysterical.
Told him I gave her his room number, and she would be stopping by later. He damn near shit himself.
It’s twu, it’s twu! I looked it up and, in fact, elitedaily.com IS running an article titled, “How to dopamine dress for every 2022 holiday scenario.” You, literally, can not make this stuff up.
I checked, the misspellings are there in the original marketing copy for The Razor Blade Company. You think they’d spend a couple hundred bucks and get someone to look that stuff over.
"What a fool believes he sees
No wise man has the power
To reason away"
Only you could make a story about freaking razor blades into tale about stealing some rich bum's ex-stripper wife. First you tell all the "orbiters" to put a barrel in their mouth, then you hand them some ammo. Bravo.
Like the late Mac Miller, I'm just out here being me, as frustrating as it may be to both my friends and foes!
Sorta like the marines. There is no such thing as a former stripper.
Lyrics you've heard a thousand times are strange when you read them as prose.
This is the opposite of a safe space. I fully expect to read things that challenge or offend me, or at least that I disagree with. And I expect that I will be called on my own bullshit if I post some of it. That’s what I signed up and paid for.
On the subject of orbiters, I met my wife and 20 and married her at 25. I thank God all the time I don’t have to deal with all of the bullshit you describe, and with luck and a little bit of effort, I hopefully never will.
Agreed on all of the above, but nobody here is going to demand you be homeless and broke because you misgendered an anime character.
Which ain't all that difficult, if you're going by appearance.
With stuff like Futanari how could you not misgender? For the uninformed, just do a search on "balls or no balls".
Japan is a magnificent country.
Yeah, I'm not sure about the "safe space" label, but ACF is a very unique corner of today's internet because of the intelligent conversation going on. Nobody is here just to troll, start fights, or get offended by an opinion that doesn't exactly mirror their own. I haven't run across any miserable souls who are just here to point out typos or desperatly trying to show that they know more about cars - or the topic of the day - than the author, therefore proving to themselves that they should be the ones with their name on top of the page instead of mixed in with the plebs at the bottom (the "Insurance Company community" was (and probably still is) unbearable because of this).
So, maybe that does make it, quote, unquote, "safe," but whatever it is, it is special! Thanks for gambling on yourself, Jack!
You ever go to the zoo or aquarium on a free day vs a regular paid day? It’s sort of like that. Free generally brings out the dregs of society.
In droves!
I live about an hour from Pictured Rocks in Upper Michigan. They have a "free" day for Yoopers on their boat tours. My wife, skinflint that she is, has suggested going and I've always refused to go because holy shit, no way am I being surrounded by a crowd like that.
So I read the comment about going to the zoo or aquarium on freeday, and all the freaks that turn up. First thing I thought about was the free day for Yooper’s at the pictured rock tours. We have lived in different places in the UP that were just a short drive from this and we knew people that would go to it. I told my wife there is no freaking way I’m gonna go stand in line with the unwashed. Considering I wear an old beat up Carhart and equally beat up Red Wings, that’s really saying something.
I'm from New England .
I'm still pissed off at Red Wing Shoes for discontinuing the glossy black steel toed wingtips..
-Nate
Whereabouts in the UP are you? I've probably been in your neck of the woods at one time or another.
When my oldest was a toddler, we went bombing through what was then the unpaved truck trail through the Pictured Rocks in a Volvo 142E in order to get to the tour boat in Munising on time. Then I had to physically restrain her from going over the rail into Superior as she tried to make friends with the seagulls.
We're in Marquette right now. We're looking to move out into the woods within the next year. It's quite a bit different now versus when we were here for college (we both graduated '05). It used to be the city itself was a fairly quiet place, even when the students are here, and if you ventured out into the wilderness you would be completely alone. Even Pictured Rocks used to have some very nice solitary hiking. All that has changed now. It's still quite beautiful, but you have to be willing to share it with the hordes of tourists all year round, because it doesn't die off in the winter. We see snowmobilers, skiers, ice fishermen, etc etc, and RVs and fifth-wheel trailers stretching all the way to the horizon. I don't want to become one of those old guys who dreams about how much better things were in his youth, but... things were better when I was younger! Still a pretty nice place to live, though, especially compared against where I grew up in and around Toledo.
Might be fun to watch the mouth breathers, sort of like the people of wallmart .
-Nate
If I were motivated I’d compile all of the boot strap boomer posts from Hagerty.
Then please find the motivation. I'd love to read those.
It will just make you want to Kurt Cobain yourself.
"I worked three hours a day at the surf shop, put myself through UCLA, and bought a 1969 Z-28 with the extra money, right before we spent $4,999 on a new house in Malibu!"
You bring up an interesting point.
How in the name of Zeus's butthole do productive, ambitious people get all that stuff done? Think Manhattan stockbrokers. 80 hours a week, and yet they still have time to go apartment hunting, commute ungodly distances and to socialize after work. When IS "after work," anyway?
To paraphrase Morpheus, "What is 'Safe?' How do you define 'Safe?'"
I was thinking more along the lines of, "I'm up on the roof without a fall harness, but no one's shooting at me."
And in one way I'm horribly exposed to danger, but from another point of view I'm cruisin'.
Safety's a matter of perspective.
I use Personna Lab Blue double edge blades in my MerKur 34C. They’re excellent. Factory is in Verona VA. American Safety Razor co which became Edgewell after Walmart fucked ASR. Only USA made dual edge. I don’t know of any other besides Gillette so I believe you are the first to actually put this new info on the internet. Fantastic research.
My single buddy and I were shooting the shit last night about his dating travails and triumphs. His observation is that reasonably attractive women are really good at drawing in orbiters through thirst trap social media posts. So much so that they believe all men should orbit them for a while regardless of their attractiveness, status, or what value they offer for the future. He's become extremely adept at recognizing the motions of these lifeless planets and avoids them like the plague they are. He's got stories, man.
Thanks to the simp economy, some women have valued themselves the way old men do their “1 of 1” Corvettes. Many of these women could easily be mistaken for planets.
Some seem to be big enough to have their own gravitational fields.
Certainly their egos can simulate such a field.
"My fat chick is best fat chick..."
Can’t comment on USA made blades, but Feather out of Japan makes the finest blades I’ve used. As a “safety” razor devotee, I can attest to their quality and sharpness, having tested many brands on the calibrated instrument known as my pretty face. Also #dontsimpforthe403s
Feathers tore me up, not sure why. I was using Gillette Silver Blue, until they went all woke feminist a few years back. Now I use Personna.
I've shaved with Feather for years. Those and the "Israel" blades are the only 2 that can shave me without damaging my skin. My whiskers are so coarse, they could be recycled as industrial grit.
I use Feathers in my OneBlade.
I have the same problem. I just stopped shaving. I use a peanut and have a perpetual 5:00 shadow or more.
I'll have to check them out, running no name Russian (not a joke) blades in my Merkur at the moment.
They're not great blades and I have to change them every 3rd shave. First is okay, second is sketchy, third feels like it's pulling hair out.
Orbiters. Pathetic. Talk to her or forget about her, but never pine for her.
Or fuck one of her friends, the slutty one who will talk about it . If done well enough she will come around simply out of curiosity.
Talk to her then ignore her that’s magic
"luanched" "baldes"
I hope the quality control on their blade manufacturing is better than on their advertising copy. Make enough typos and I'll start thinking you might not be a native English speaker.
I do wonder at times what some of these former 'ladies' in your life looked like. Moreso because of the names you've given them than any other reason.
I'll also never understand rich parents who don't take the time to teach their children the meaning of work. For me, that's a head scratcher and I've seen it far too many times.
I've posted a lot of photos over the years; just searching Vodka McBigbra brings up a few!
The first time that I met Vodka was at a big auto show. I may have helped Jack with her creds to get in the media preview as he'd sometimes give me a list of people to get in through my web site. Jack was busy with something and I was talking to her and I guess I assumed she was a writer and she said, "I know Jack from outside the industry," with a perfectly salacious inflection.
Cut and pasted from when I asked the same question under a different thread:
"Drama is on the left, between me and a Nashville starlet: https://cdn-fastly.thetruthaboutcars.com/media/2022/06/30/8668683/thank-you-and-goodbye-sort-of.jpg?size=720x845&nocrop=1
Vodka is here, with a 370Z: https://cdn-fastly.thetruthaboutcars.com/media/2022/07/17/8993210/ask-the-best-brightest-is-vodkas-future-just-a-mirage.jpg?size=720x845&nocrop=1
Drama looks exactly like one of my exes.
Thanks it’s nice to put actual faces to my imagination.
Jack was a pretty suave looking guy, no wonder!
Yeah I just fell apart over the last decade. I cannot recommend getting old!
Over the past decade, because of my dad's medical problems and my own symptoms of middle age, I've had cause to wonder if maybe the warrior cultures of the world aren't right - that it's best to die on a battlefield when you're 30, quickly and honorably, before you have to suffer the indignities of growing old.
I suspect it was more like dying on the battlefield when they were 35-40, next to their adult sons. You'll find references to grandfathers in every ancient culture, so people had to be living at least slightly past thirty. I hope.
I’ve managed to reverse a little of the cycle with strict diet and exercise but i can see it fighting back harder every day, especially when I backslide. The thing that bothers me the most is hairloss. I turn 40 in March and I don’t expect to survive the next decade without living as George Costanza.
In those regards, you’ll be winning until the end of time...or at least your own. I’ll never enjoy the Sean Connery look that seems to the staple of age.
Maybe you can't BE Sean Connery, but you CAN slap your woman to keep her in line.
Just remember to use an open hand.
Gator don’t play haha!
Ha ha ha
When I came up to NMU for orientation I hung out with this tall, attractive girl for a little while. a month and a half later, having kept touch, I met up with her again but she had assembled quite a little gaggle of semiliterate orbiters. I opted instead to spend a night with her less-attractive older sister, because why not? Despite my lack of dignity I could never bring myself to orbit someone like that. It's a waste of my time.
On a sort of related note, I used to watch Regular Car Reviews on youtube for his jarring and oddly funny humor. One of the last videos of his I ever watched (a few years ago now) was one about, oh, I think it was a Challenger, I don't remember if it was the Hellcat, but he compared it to your "apex girl," the girl you dated that you put on a pedestal and to whom you compare all subsequent dates. It never made sense to me because, while I have shown some bad judgment in girls, I married exactly the one I wanted. I had competition for her, a wealthy young man from Thailand who went to Yale for grad school and is likely worth at least seven figures these days, and a boxer in the US Olympic training program. Both were orbiters. The Thai man gave her a cute teddy bear and wrote her sweet notes. The boxer showed up at her door crying about how much he was in love with her. I told her exactly what I wanted out of her and made it clear I'd walk and never think about her again with no regrets. I honestly had no idea what I was doing at the time but it worked out. Never orbit. Never settle.
I believe the RCR guy is a furry, if that helps explain things at all.
You know, it kind of does.
I suppose I could have been described as an orbiter or being friendzoned by the woman whom I eventually married or you could say I was playing the long game. From the time we met, when she was dating someone else, I made my intentions clear, so clear, in fact, that her boyfriend threatened me. They broke up when he decided that her roommate's Dutch-girl-from-Grand Rapids perfect teardrop tits were too perfect to resist. We started hanging around and one night it stopped being platonic.
OMG razors don’t get me started! In my past career they were very important. The best were Americanline .009s if I couldn’t get them I would be like a two pack a day smoker with no cigs.
I knew a guy who had a razor sharpener so he could keep them going. I can just imagine him spending his nights honing his razors to save a few cents.
Good subject I must say!
ah the stories i could tell...sorry to be a tease. i don't like teases but i do like myself!
Im about 30 minutes from IDL, and now you’ve piqued my interest in checking it out. How i would plausibly explain this trip to my wife, I have not yet figured out.
No explanation necessary Steve ;
Just ask if she wants to go when you go .
-Nate
I spent the better part of 10 years in and around the food brokerage business. Guessing your Dad's former pals sold to Crossmark, Advantage or Acosta. Those 3, with PE backing, rolled up hundreds of small brokers. In a not shocking at all result, after the feeding frenzy was over they started racing each other to cut out all of the people (costs) that made the indies worth acquiring.
There's a decently strong pendulum-swing back to a new generation of independent brokerages that are easily picking up clients while the big 3 nationals focus on servicing their huge debt load.
Advantage!
Re: Waitresses, Bartenders, Strippers and guys that fawn over them.
“She likes me.” Yep, as long as the money keeps coming. It’s a business transaction for goodness sake!
The male ego is an amazing thing. My dad upon entering the “senior living” establishment he lived in after his second (much younger) wife cleaned him out— then threw him out, “There’s nobody appealing here”. While I had to hand it to him for still wanting to chase some skirts in his 80’s, learn your lesson! I have to admit, I immediately shot back at him, “And what do you think they are saying about you? You’re fat, bald and broke.”
If you’re a 6 and she’s a 9 she’s either a hooker or has an angle. Men probably have more horsepower in the brain department but women sure utilize it better when they need to
Not sure about men being smarter than women; but we’re certainly more logical. Unless we’re thinking with our dicks. Another story, to elaborate on your point. Traveling on business with a product guy— Client meeting/dinner. He and I went to the hotel bar afterward. We were both in our 40’s, the only 2 guys in suits. Gorgeous girl, 20 something, slides in next to him. Dressed in a suit, but the skirt was a little shorter than what we usually saw at work. It was a very boisterous crowd, I can’t hear what’s being said; but she’s got the flirty body language going— touching his arm, laughing a lot, etc. Now, he’s average looking, with not much personality; and again, in his 40’s. Also, he didn’t travel much. Very obvious to me what’s going on, and I’m loving it. He suddenly spins around to me in horror, “She’s a hooker! Get rid of her! I’m going to the bathroom!” After he came back I asked him, “How often does a beautiful girl in her twenties strike up a conversation with you? In fact, how often did it happen when you were in your twenties?” Hysterical.
Told him I gave her his room number, and she would be stopping by later. He damn near shit himself.
That’s exactly my point. You stated it better
Not really, just used a story to emphasize it.
Tell me a story Dave…
"But when she got undressed, it was a big ol' mess! Sheena was a MAN!"
Trust me. That was no man.
And I’m old enough that the Kinks “Lola” would be the song I would reference if it was a man.
The more appropriate lyric from Mr. Loc would be, “I need fifty dollars to make you holler, I get paid to do the Wild Thing!”
It’s twu, it’s twu! I looked it up and, in fact, elitedaily.com IS running an article titled, “How to dopamine dress for every 2022 holiday scenario.” You, literally, can not make this stuff up.
I would like my time reading part of that article back.
What a strange way to describe "wearing clothes you enjoy" - I guess that doesn't fit well in a tiktok.
Modern women don't seem to be able to grasp any concept or phrasing that is more than 36 months old.
I checked, the misspellings are there in the original marketing copy for The Razor Blade Company. You think they’d spend a couple hundred bucks and get someone to look that stuff over.
Christ! News outlets don't even do this any more.
My local paper had a headline that mentioned “chimpanzees on the lamb” the other day.
It created quite a visual of chimps dressed like cowboys riding sheep.
My local paper once had the headline "Gas Problem at Local Taco Bell."
After a single vehicle highway crash, the local paper here used the headline " Dog Dies In Rollover ".
But, of course, I'm the dumb one for suggesting these people could have gotten a major story wrong...
Sounds like, "Ike Beats Tina To Death."