From about 1980-2005, my dad had subs to various car magazines. The only consistent sub was Autoweek, the rest cycled between C&D, R&T, and Automobile.
When I asked why he did this, the response was basically that Autoweek was for following races and the classified ads. The others were for actually reading.
I believe Crain still owns Autoweek. If/when the agreement with Hearst ends, I wonder if they’ll do anything with the name.
I remember the anti prole sentiment at Car&Driver, where they advocated for higher taxes on the common motorists, I don’t think I renewed my subscription after that editorial. I think that writers like Patrick Bedard, once gone were what killed print magazines, Bedard was exceptional, Yates was not, I don’t remember liking Dutch, I remember Autoweek going downhill, really sad that we can’t have objective writing about cars and drivers, given the very diverse nature of the subject. Riverside Green and this substack are the exception in this game.
Brock Yates made me angry at least half the time he wrote something.
He was also probably my favorite autojournalist until Jack came along. He was who he was, and wrote whatever he wanted to write (or at least that's how it appeared to a smart-mouthed kid from flyover country). He was something of a hero to me, in the sense that he apologized to no one. I took inspiration that a man could find his way through life saying what he thought and letting the chips fall where they would.
I LIKED Peter Egan (and his spiritual successor, Sam Smith), but I found myself reading and rereading the stuff Yates and the rest of that collection of C&D writers in the Csaba Csere-era C&D put out, when it truly was the irreverent, seemingly independent bad-boy of the car rag world.
Sam and Zach Bowman are both in the running for Egan's chair. But Bowman is doing Dirt Hammer now (SxS classifieds) since he did an editing gig at a SxS magazine for a while. Hopefully it's because he wants to and he's got a vintage Jeep affliction to feed in addition to a fam.
I wish they would both write long form stuff and put it anywhere but a mag masthead. They're both nice IRL.
Csere's first column as Editor of C&D mentioned the pronunciation of his name like this: (pronounced Csere) and I can remember having hope that C&D was in good hands.
Brock un-kicked me out of One Lap after his weird porno-stache son kicked me out. I liked him. He spoke his mind. He was perhaps too transparent about his desire to be a New York Literary Someone, but I can't hold that against him.
That makes me glad to hear (that he wasn't a closet narcissist or drama-queen). He wrote in a very straight-up, "everybody's entitled to my own opinion" style, which I appreciated as a kid who thought everybody should care to hear the echo of each random thought passing through my head
.. and yes -- I'd suppose the David E. Davis syndrome was pretty thick back in the day. Now THERE'S a guy who is revered, whom I never cared for. He was too smug by half.
We have been in the Eddie era since he became EIC. He micromanages the magazine behind the scenes and to my knowledge has made each and every decision of even minor significance to the present day.
I think that beginning in the late 80’s, there was a coordinated effort by multiple groups to push sustainability, the magazines all started pushing for mass transit and egalitarian policies to push people out of their cars, while not successful, that was the push.
For the most part, they were college graduates educated in leftist politics and economics, if they could write about automotive, they could write about just about anything.
The argument was that if we had higher cost per gallon, e.g. europe, then people would choose to drive more fuel efficient cars (if they needed them), and thus CAFE could be abandoned.
I could get behind this. Why should a little old lady who only drives 5 miles to church on sunday be forced to (over-)pay for all kinds of expensive fuel saving technologies that will never pay themselves back?
"a bizarre rant about how fat and stupid Americans are"
i feel like these tend to originate from people who have never encountered anyone else on more than a surface level. its grating
"a two-page “Father’s Day Gift Guide” full of worthless garbage"
arent they all though
"No, this isn’t Tuscany"
BE IN AWE OF HOW WORLDY AND CULTURED I AM
"It’s even worse when you consider that your humble author is 6’2″ and 230 pounds, certainly no lightweight himself and perhaps not ideally suited to make fun of other fat people"
but youre not anymore which means you can
"The car culture of the United States is equal to, or superior to, that of any country in the world, and we have the racetracks, the autocross courses, and the vintage festivals to prove it"
The irony of Labor Day is not lost on any union working man in the skilled trades.
It is one of the Big 6: NYD, Memorial Day, Independence Day, Labor Day, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. The common thread of those holidays is that while the journeymen and apprentices take the day off, they do so without pay.
Please allow the irony of that to sink in. Union workers are forced to take a day off without pay... to celebrate union labor.
I've never had a paid day off in 45 years of working or in 62 years of living, but as the owner of the shop-- I give my guys 8 hrs pay for Labor Day (as well as 2- 3 weeks of PTO) because it seems like the right thing to do.
I always wanted to get paid to go to Europe, drive cars too fast, and come home and write about it. I'll content myself with going to Portugal in 6 days, paying for it myself, and resting secure in the knowledge that the guys I give more to than their collective bargaining agreement says I must will be taking care of my business while I'm gone.
The street runs both ways, gentlemen. Happy Labor Day.
We’re pipefitters (Steamfitters 353), but we’re in the commercial refrigeration service business— supermarket cases and cold storage warehouses. We do just enough commercial HVAC to be happy it’s not the main line of business.
I just got back from a road trip to the Gilmore Car Museum which is just outside of Kalamazoo, a mere 3 hours from you. I don’t think your girls would be interested in it, but maybe there’s a lake resort nearby that the kids would enjoy while Dad is at the museum.
It’s a fantastic museum. There’s so many cool cars there that I experienced automotive sensory overload for the first few hours I was there. I’m definitely going back.
The French are generally extremely polite, save in Paris (and maybe some tourist hot spots on the south coast). But they will think you rude if you don't greet everyone with a definite "Bonjour!"
I’ve been 3 times (France/Spain, France, and Italy), and I think you are missing out. I like to make fun of the lazy smelly Euros too, but you owe it to yourself to see how others live. They have the right idea in a number of ways.
But leave your crotch goblins at home. Mine haven’t been yet. If I can find a spare $15-20k I may bring them next year. We’ll see.
It is beyond amusing to me that you guys work yourselves into a frenzy about my personal life, something to which I rarely if ever make reference (one way or another).
Great call. I was struck last time I was there that they’re all proud of their countries, yet they all willingly gave up their sovereignty to the EU. And they didn’t realize the obvious contradiction.
Hey, Jack, out of a clear blue sky and because I may not remember this again, ever, I want to share with you my only automotive world celebrity sighting. It was Gentleman Jim Kimberly and the occasion was the set of a 50's TV show entitled You Asked For It. I was there because of a nominal involvement in an activity of no great significance and he was there because of his prominence in motor racing. He was a great looking guy, thin with silver hair and handsome features. He was also very wealthy, his family controlled Kimberly-Clark the manufacturers of Kleenex.
Autoweek back in the 60's and 70's was fuel for dreams. I wanted to buy or at least sit in every old racecar in the classified section. That and the JC Whitney catalogs. My father wouldn't spring for the dune buggy exhaust on his Beetle.
JC Whitney accessories live on at Porsche. Every time I see the latest 911 “limited edition”, all the exterior doodads Porsche plasters on their cars to make them “special” just reminds me of JC Whitney catalog add-ons. I’m just waiting for Porsche to slap some chrome ventiports on their front fenders.
My grandparents had the bobble head dog and the plastic seat covers with the little triangles. Also the beanbag ashtray and of course the praying hands.
I subscribed to R&T, C&D, and Autoweek back in the day.
It was always fun to read the classifieds and see “Corvette Vicki” in the back.
I can’t remember what year they went to shit, but I remember Autoweek turning to shit overnight.
When they no longer published weekly, that’s when I finally stopped subscribing.
I haven’t subscribed to any of the “Buff Books” for years.
I was very pleased to discover you, Jack, online somewhere. I couldn’t believe it, here was a guy who really knows how to write, and whose opinions seem to mirror mine. I was thrilled.
I then actively sought out your writing, and then lost track of you, and then somehow discovered this forum and your writing again.
Oh, happy day!
Thanks for this blast from the past and the insight into Autoweek.
“Breakfast shifting, not double clutching like you should. Now me and the mad lasagna have to rip apart the block and replace the pepperoni rolls you just fried”
As a weekly broadsheet Autoweek couldn't be beat for up to date F1 and IndyCar racing along with automotive stories on par with the monthlies and columnists I always looked forward to reading. Leon Mandel had a walk on role in my favorite Paul Newman movie
https://youtu.be/kidFHfSJhd4?si=DUg9-icnOkkXBnQg and the Grande Dame of automotive journalism published the only collection of columns that-even though I have a wide variety which include among others Peter Egan, DED Jr, Sam Smith, PJ O'Rourke and an utterly forgettable compilation Never Stop Driving-I still regularly pull from it's bookcase and revisit. Matter of fact in memorium I'll be heading up to grab that now and put on some Dave Brubeck for accompaniment (even though I suspect she fucked Miles).
....his eyes look like a two-player game of “Marble Madness”...
Nice reference. I really liked that game. At our local bowling alley, I spent many of my mom's quarters having my marble dissolve in acid on the second maze. Either that or it got eaten by the worm.
I met Sig in Chicago in 2019 or so. He was in town to promote his latest coffee table tome, and he expected each of the three standout private cigar clubs in the city to (1) host him, (2) hold an event in his honor, and (3) provide him with plenty of free cigars for his troubles.
So: On one beautiful autumn Saturday in Chicago, I found myself sitting in a four person seating area with my extremely rotund trustafarian friend taking up one seat, and his various accoutrements taking up another.
Sig joined us, uninvited. He was wearing a voluminous suit and the Lanvin sneakers that were hip at the time in NYC media circles. He was in the midst of his book signing “event,” and it appeared that the cigar club had not done any work to promote his presence, given ZERO people had shown up to shake his hand, take a selfie, or buy a $1,000+ coffee table book. This was deeply embarrassing to him. He passed the time by talking down to us (we were about 30 at the time).
At one point, he bemoaned the cost of living in New York and said “Wow, Chicago is so much cheaper than New York. You guys have it so easy! New York is tough. I mean, I have friends who are millionaires, and they still struggle.”
Immediate, involuntary eye contact between two thirds of the table.
The trustafarian - who, despite the fact that he transgressed his way through boarding school (at his father’s undergraduate alma mater: they told him not to bother applying for college) and attended “some college” at several different institutions of higher learning, including an open enrollment school at one point, before dropping out to live off his father’s wealth - is clever and well spoken, which is one reason we are good friends. He cleared his throat and said:
“That statement implies that you are NOT a millionaire.”
*Awkward silence*
“You may not know this, but you are sitting in a space that was once a private club for millionaires. It was called ‘The Millionaires’ Club.’ I’d like to ask you to leave our table, if not the Club entirely, since you are rude, discourteous, and … broke.”
Sig got up in a huff and complained to the owner. Something along the lines of: “I bullied my way into hosting an event in your store, and then no one showed up to buy my book, which is YOUR fault. Anyway, I made a fool of myself in front of two of your members who spend a fortune in your store every year, and I’m embarrassed. Also, they’re half my age. I’d like you to take this issue up with them.”
———————————————————————————
Anyway:
Sig and Dutch like to hang out in South Carolina together. Dutch will secure a luxury car from - e.g., Bentley - and then Dutch (or another photographer?) will take artistic beauty shots of Sig holding an unlit cigar in someone else’s car for his Instagram.
All you need is a pair of Nike Air Max 90s. Bona fide design classic. It’s the only sneaker I’ll wear. It’s also the only sneaker that doesn’t trigger cramp in my cramp prone feet but that’s beside the point.
This is worse than the $300 cashmere socks from that luxury wool brand you like. What kind of strange human buys a $600 pair of shoes and they not be custom-made for your specific feet? At least those cashmere socks will be soft as a newborn's cheeks and breathe like rarefied Himalyan mountain air!
Speaking of bad journalism, you failed to name Dutch’s dad, the great Leon Mandel.
I mentioned him twice.
"Biblical" is always good.
saintjean
From about 1980-2005, my dad had subs to various car magazines. The only consistent sub was Autoweek, the rest cycled between C&D, R&T, and Automobile.
When I asked why he did this, the response was basically that Autoweek was for following races and the classified ads. The others were for actually reading.
I believe Crain still owns Autoweek. If/when the agreement with Hearst ends, I wonder if they’ll do anything with the name.
sell it to a private equity firm, which will shamelessly sell everything for parts, including the archive
they'll sell it to OpenAI or another AI firm. they've been buying access to archives like that.
They don’t need to pay for it when they can just get it for free
Hell yeah, brother
I remember the anti prole sentiment at Car&Driver, where they advocated for higher taxes on the common motorists, I don’t think I renewed my subscription after that editorial. I think that writers like Patrick Bedard, once gone were what killed print magazines, Bedard was exceptional, Yates was not, I don’t remember liking Dutch, I remember Autoweek going downhill, really sad that we can’t have objective writing about cars and drivers, given the very diverse nature of the subject. Riverside Green and this substack are the exception in this game.
Brock Yates made me angry at least half the time he wrote something.
He was also probably my favorite autojournalist until Jack came along. He was who he was, and wrote whatever he wanted to write (or at least that's how it appeared to a smart-mouthed kid from flyover country). He was something of a hero to me, in the sense that he apologized to no one. I took inspiration that a man could find his way through life saying what he thought and letting the chips fall where they would.
I LIKED Peter Egan (and his spiritual successor, Sam Smith), but I found myself reading and rereading the stuff Yates and the rest of that collection of C&D writers in the Csaba Csere-era C&D put out, when it truly was the irreverent, seemingly independent bad-boy of the car rag world.
Fair enough, liked Egan, and Csere, but you could see C&D losing it’s status as one of the greatest franchises.
Who the hell did Angus MacKenzie write for? Cause he was Eurotrash enough to be the villain in an action movie.
CAR, then MotorTrend.
I met him in the hotel bar at Car Design Event last year and slightly drunkenly asked him to tell me about Bulgin.
He sucks but somehow Ed Loh is worse.
Saw Angus in a recent article in Car. He’s baaack
Shouldn't he be on a beach somewhere, earning 20%?
The "g" is silent.
Sam Smith is a great writer imo
I like him too. I really hope he's half as good a guy as he seems in his writing. I do think he's Egan's spiritual heir.
The Sam you get in real life is essentially similar to the authorial Sam. He's a nice person and great fun to hang around.
Sam and Zach Bowman are both in the running for Egan's chair. But Bowman is doing Dirt Hammer now (SxS classifieds) since he did an editing gig at a SxS magazine for a while. Hopefully it's because he wants to and he's got a vintage Jeep affliction to feed in addition to a fam.
I wish they would both write long form stuff and put it anywhere but a mag masthead. They're both nice IRL.
I can't follow him. Always seems like informal rambling.
I always liked working with Sam because we were so different as writers and people, I figured that together we covered most of the audience.
thats the best part
Csere's first column as Editor of C&D mentioned the pronunciation of his name like this: (pronounced Csere) and I can remember having hope that C&D was in good hands.
Brock un-kicked me out of One Lap after his weird porno-stache son kicked me out. I liked him. He spoke his mind. He was perhaps too transparent about his desire to be a New York Literary Someone, but I can't hold that against him.
That makes me glad to hear (that he wasn't a closet narcissist or drama-queen). He wrote in a very straight-up, "everybody's entitled to my own opinion" style, which I appreciated as a kid who thought everybody should care to hear the echo of each random thought passing through my head
.. and yes -- I'd suppose the David E. Davis syndrome was pretty thick back in the day. Now THERE'S a guy who is revered, whom I never cared for. He was too smug by half.
C/D was purged of irreverent takes just about when they started to officially label themselves "irreverent"
Yeah, in Eddie Alterman's deeply cucked and incompetent era. They claimed to be irreverent but they were actually irrelevant.
That was better than the Tony Quiroga era.
We have been in the Eddie era since he became EIC. He micromanages the magazine behind the scenes and to my knowledge has made each and every decision of even minor significance to the present day.
As bad as Eddie was (and he was bad), he was a freaking wordsmith and idiot savant compared to Sharon Silke Carty.
That's when I realized one didn't even have to like cars to be a car rag editor for Hearst.
If quality's on the label, it ain't in the product.
Motortrend in the 2000s was frequently advocating for higher gas taxes. Naive junior high me was convinced.
I think that beginning in the late 80’s, there was a coordinated effort by multiple groups to push sustainability, the magazines all started pushing for mass transit and egalitarian policies to push people out of their cars, while not successful, that was the push.
It's been truly odd to me that car rags were staffed by people who don't like cars.
For the most part, they were college graduates educated in leftist politics and economics, if they could write about automotive, they could write about just about anything.
They are just imitating the Lizard People who run the car companies.
The argument was that if we had higher cost per gallon, e.g. europe, then people would choose to drive more fuel efficient cars (if they needed them), and thus CAFE could be abandoned.
I could get behind this. Why should a little old lady who only drives 5 miles to church on sunday be forced to (over-)pay for all kinds of expensive fuel saving technologies that will never pay themselves back?
Why force anything on anyone once we put catalytic converters on cars.
"a bizarre rant about how fat and stupid Americans are"
i feel like these tend to originate from people who have never encountered anyone else on more than a surface level. its grating
"a two-page “Father’s Day Gift Guide” full of worthless garbage"
arent they all though
"No, this isn’t Tuscany"
BE IN AWE OF HOW WORLDY AND CULTURED I AM
"It’s even worse when you consider that your humble author is 6’2″ and 230 pounds, certainly no lightweight himself and perhaps not ideally suited to make fun of other fat people"
but youre not anymore which means you can
"The car culture of the United States is equal to, or superior to, that of any country in the world, and we have the racetracks, the autocross courses, and the vintage festivals to prove it"
REAL
bf% can be great when you combine it with those prior measurements too
True! (says the Brit). Scary specimens now abound.
BMI as well (which I believe is different, but may not be).
You're well aware that ᴅᴇᴀᴛʜ ꜱᴘᴇᴀᴋꜱ ɪɴ ꜱᴍᴀʟʟ ᴄᴀᴘꜱ.
The irony of Labor Day is not lost on any union working man in the skilled trades.
It is one of the Big 6: NYD, Memorial Day, Independence Day, Labor Day, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. The common thread of those holidays is that while the journeymen and apprentices take the day off, they do so without pay.
Please allow the irony of that to sink in. Union workers are forced to take a day off without pay... to celebrate union labor.
I've never had a paid day off in 45 years of working or in 62 years of living, but as the owner of the shop-- I give my guys 8 hrs pay for Labor Day (as well as 2- 3 weeks of PTO) because it seems like the right thing to do.
I always wanted to get paid to go to Europe, drive cars too fast, and come home and write about it. I'll content myself with going to Portugal in 6 days, paying for it myself, and resting secure in the knowledge that the guys I give more to than their collective bargaining agreement says I must will be taking care of my business while I'm gone.
The street runs both ways, gentlemen. Happy Labor Day.
We’re pipefitters (Steamfitters 353), but we’re in the commercial refrigeration service business— supermarket cases and cold storage warehouses. We do just enough commercial HVAC to be happy it’s not the main line of business.
"Real American Heroes..."
Good for you. My dad was a pipefitter, Local 636 in Detroit.
Europe is cheaper than spending 2 weeks in Florida, and easily twice as cool, assuming art and history interest you at all.
The snottiness of the people (France included) is WAY overstated.
All our kids are long grown, Scott. We took zero vacations when they were that age — my hat’s off to you for even trying.
Disney is next-level crazy money. Well done (I think).
I just got back from a road trip to the Gilmore Car Museum which is just outside of Kalamazoo, a mere 3 hours from you. I don’t think your girls would be interested in it, but maybe there’s a lake resort nearby that the kids would enjoy while Dad is at the museum.
It’s a fantastic museum. There’s so many cool cars there that I experienced automotive sensory overload for the first few hours I was there. I’m definitely going back.
The French are generally extremely polite, save in Paris (and maybe some tourist hot spots on the south coast). But they will think you rude if you don't greet everyone with a definite "Bonjour!"
I found the French were polite -- even in Paris.
A taxi driver told me that since the covid, they realized that they needed us (our money actually) more than they thought.
But you're right; you should always say Bonjour as soon as your foot crosses the threshold. If you can do that, they're a lot nicer to you.
When a simple “Bonjour” doesn’t work:
"Bonjour, singes mangeurs de fromage et lâches !"
I’ve been 3 times (France/Spain, France, and Italy), and I think you are missing out. I like to make fun of the lazy smelly Euros too, but you owe it to yourself to see how others live. They have the right idea in a number of ways.
But leave your crotch goblins at home. Mine haven’t been yet. If I can find a spare $15-20k I may bring them next year. We’ll see.
“Ive never been to europe”
Not surprised!
It is beyond amusing to me that you guys work yourselves into a frenzy about my personal life, something to which I rarely if ever make reference (one way or another).
Europe is a museum. You go there to see the history of western civilization and where we came from.
However, once you've been there you realize that Europe is the past and America is the future.
Even the Dutch refer to us (the UK) as "Museum Island."
Great call. I was struck last time I was there that they’re all proud of their countries, yet they all willingly gave up their sovereignty to the EU. And they didn’t realize the obvious contradiction.
Well, I never been to Spain
But I kinda like the music…
"That's why you pay me a hundred grand a year."
"I pay you FIFTY as far as the IRS is concerned. Why do you think you get half your pay in cash?"
Hey, Jack, out of a clear blue sky and because I may not remember this again, ever, I want to share with you my only automotive world celebrity sighting. It was Gentleman Jim Kimberly and the occasion was the set of a 50's TV show entitled You Asked For It. I was there because of a nominal involvement in an activity of no great significance and he was there because of his prominence in motor racing. He was a great looking guy, thin with silver hair and handsome features. He was also very wealthy, his family controlled Kimberly-Clark the manufacturers of Kleenex.
Autoweek back in the 60's and 70's was fuel for dreams. I wanted to buy or at least sit in every old racecar in the classified section. That and the JC Whitney catalogs. My father wouldn't spring for the dune buggy exhaust on his Beetle.
Loved the JC Whitney catalog!
You couldn't grow up in the '70s without loving it. Something for everybody.
Then I discovered Summit Racing, and it was over for me.
I even lusted after stuff I would never have a real use for and sometimes didn’t even know what they were!
JC Whitney accessories live on at Porsche. Every time I see the latest 911 “limited edition”, all the exterior doodads Porsche plasters on their cars to make them “special” just reminds me of JC Whitney catalog add-ons. I’m just waiting for Porsche to slap some chrome ventiports on their front fenders.
Looking forward to them offering Winky The Cat
https://blog.consumerguide.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/2/2015/02/Screen-shot-2015-02-26-at-10.48.15-AM.png
I want one!
My grandparents had the bobble head dog and the plastic seat covers with the little triangles. Also the beanbag ashtray and of course the praying hands.
JC Whitney! Yes!
Gee according to Linked-In your topic of conversation was an Editor at Auto Week for 40 years…. That is government employee type of longevity…
https://www.linkedin.com/in/dutch-mandel-b4586473
His father ran the place.
Oh that explains it…
I subscribed to R&T, C&D, and Autoweek back in the day.
It was always fun to read the classifieds and see “Corvette Vicki” in the back.
I can’t remember what year they went to shit, but I remember Autoweek turning to shit overnight.
When they no longer published weekly, that’s when I finally stopped subscribing.
I haven’t subscribed to any of the “Buff Books” for years.
I was very pleased to discover you, Jack, online somewhere. I couldn’t believe it, here was a guy who really knows how to write, and whose opinions seem to mirror mine. I was thrilled.
I then actively sought out your writing, and then lost track of you, and then somehow discovered this forum and your writing again.
Oh, happy day!
Thanks for this blast from the past and the insight into Autoweek.
“Breakfast shifting, not double clutching like you should. Now me and the mad lasagna have to rip apart the block and replace the pepperoni rolls you just fried”
Wait wut?
2fat2manycalories
Totino’s Pizza Rolls! 😋😋
"From a distance, he appears to be a confused hippopotamus that has wandered into a pinstriped tent and is struggling desperately to escape."
God-DAMN!
Jack, you just bought yourself another year of my subscription dollars!
Well said.
As a weekly broadsheet Autoweek couldn't be beat for up to date F1 and IndyCar racing along with automotive stories on par with the monthlies and columnists I always looked forward to reading. Leon Mandel had a walk on role in my favorite Paul Newman movie
https://youtu.be/kidFHfSJhd4?si=DUg9-icnOkkXBnQg and the Grande Dame of automotive journalism published the only collection of columns that-even though I have a wide variety which include among others Peter Egan, DED Jr, Sam Smith, PJ O'Rourke and an utterly forgettable compilation Never Stop Driving-I still regularly pull from it's bookcase and revisit. Matter of fact in memorium I'll be heading up to grab that now and put on some Dave Brubeck for accompaniment (even though I suspect she fucked Miles).
https://www.abebooks.com/Brooks-Broad-LeapingSelections-Autoweek-McCluggage-Denise/32254083961/bd
....his eyes look like a two-player game of “Marble Madness”...
Nice reference. I really liked that game. At our local bowling alley, I spent many of my mom's quarters having my marble dissolve in acid on the second maze. Either that or it got eaten by the worm.
That stupid WORM! It never looked like it could cause real trouble, it moved so slowly, but it DID!
Dutch has a friend named Aaron Sigmond, who is sort of the “Dutch Mandel” of the cigar world.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aaron_Sigmond
https://www.instagram.com/sigcigar/?hl=en
I met Sig in Chicago in 2019 or so. He was in town to promote his latest coffee table tome, and he expected each of the three standout private cigar clubs in the city to (1) host him, (2) hold an event in his honor, and (3) provide him with plenty of free cigars for his troubles.
So: On one beautiful autumn Saturday in Chicago, I found myself sitting in a four person seating area with my extremely rotund trustafarian friend taking up one seat, and his various accoutrements taking up another.
Sig joined us, uninvited. He was wearing a voluminous suit and the Lanvin sneakers that were hip at the time in NYC media circles. He was in the midst of his book signing “event,” and it appeared that the cigar club had not done any work to promote his presence, given ZERO people had shown up to shake his hand, take a selfie, or buy a $1,000+ coffee table book. This was deeply embarrassing to him. He passed the time by talking down to us (we were about 30 at the time).
At one point, he bemoaned the cost of living in New York and said “Wow, Chicago is so much cheaper than New York. You guys have it so easy! New York is tough. I mean, I have friends who are millionaires, and they still struggle.”
Immediate, involuntary eye contact between two thirds of the table.
The trustafarian - who, despite the fact that he transgressed his way through boarding school (at his father’s undergraduate alma mater: they told him not to bother applying for college) and attended “some college” at several different institutions of higher learning, including an open enrollment school at one point, before dropping out to live off his father’s wealth - is clever and well spoken, which is one reason we are good friends. He cleared his throat and said:
“That statement implies that you are NOT a millionaire.”
*Awkward silence*
“You may not know this, but you are sitting in a space that was once a private club for millionaires. It was called ‘The Millionaires’ Club.’ I’d like to ask you to leave our table, if not the Club entirely, since you are rude, discourteous, and … broke.”
Sig got up in a huff and complained to the owner. Something along the lines of: “I bullied my way into hosting an event in your store, and then no one showed up to buy my book, which is YOUR fault. Anyway, I made a fool of myself in front of two of your members who spend a fortune in your store every year, and I’m embarrassed. Also, they’re half my age. I’d like you to take this issue up with them.”
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Anyway:
Sig and Dutch like to hang out in South Carolina together. Dutch will secure a luxury car from - e.g., Bentley - and then Dutch (or another photographer?) will take artistic beauty shots of Sig holding an unlit cigar in someone else’s car for his Instagram.
lanvin sneakers look like the worst skate shoes the early 2000s had to offer and he ought to be embarrassed to be seen in them
"“That statement implies that you are NOT a millionaire.”"
lmao get absolutely shit on
https://us.lanvin.com/products/dbb1-sneakers-in-suede-and-patent-leather-fm-skdbb1-vbal-p15281
These sneakers (the DBB1 Converse knock-offs).
There was a scene about them in the first season of Succession.
All you need is a pair of Nike Air Max 90s. Bona fide design classic. It’s the only sneaker I’ll wear. It’s also the only sneaker that doesn’t trigger cramp in my cramp prone feet but that’s beside the point.
bourgeoisies converse
pretty dorky and still look awful with a suit
Five hundred and ninety fucking dollars?
That’s cheap, really.
Lanvin is not owned by LVMH or Kering so they can’t really push pricing as high as the big boys.
A typical luxury “fashion sneaker” today is $900-$1,100 plus tax.
I actually really like those from Bottega:
https://www.bottegaveneta.com/en-us/orbit-sneaker-jaguar-807008V4U002729.html
This is worse than the $300 cashmere socks from that luxury wool brand you like. What kind of strange human buys a $600 pair of shoes and they not be custom-made for your specific feet? At least those cashmere socks will be soft as a newborn's cheeks and breathe like rarefied Himalyan mountain air!
Where can you get a bespoke shoe for $600? It’s more like $6,000, and there is hardly any margin in it for the cordwainer!
The loafers and point-toe brogues are among the most hideous shoes I have ever seen. Crime against humanity tier
I loathe shoe shopping because 99% of them are stunningly ugly.
I usually just go to Dillards or Von Maur every 2-3 years and get a new pair of Topsiders...
Dude! Amaretto AOs rock! (And they’re probably a little cheaper on the Sperry “store” on the jungle site.)
Hilarious!